Ruminations on Prayer Part V:

Renewing our Marriage Vows Weekly

R. Yaakov Bieler

The Kabbalat Shabbat Service (ArtScroll Siddur pp. 308-28) that takes place between Friday afternoon Mincha and Shabbat Ma’ariv, is a relatively late edition to the standard liturgy of the synagogue service. Tsfat Kabbalists in the 16^th century created a special set of prayers intended to formalize welcoming Shabbat not just for the particularly spiritual individuals of their own community, but as it turns out, a ritual engaged in by the entire worldwide Jewish community ever since. The Kabbalat Shabbat Ashkenazic liturgy eventually consisted of the recitation of Psalms 95-99, 29 and 92-3, as well as the second chapter of Mishna Shabbat.

The choices of specific Psalms and Mishnayot in general, and the liturgical poem Lecha Dodi in particular, were all originally inspired by a short passage found in two different tractates of the Talmud. The Talmudic text mentions that it was a custom among some Tannaim[1] to go out and welcome Shabbat as if it was a special guest, whose specialness derives from either her royalty or her impending nuptials.

Shabbat 119a; Bava Kama 32a

R. Chanina robed himself and stood at sunset of the evening of Shabbat and cried out, “Come and let us go out and welcome the Shabbat Queen.”[2]

R. Yanai clothed himself on the evening of Shabbat and stated, “Come, Oh Bride! Come, Oh Bride!”

The most overt contemporary remnant of the description of the actions of R. Chanina in particular, who actually would go out into the fields in order to welcome Shabbat, is the classic song Lecha Dodi, written by R. Solomon Alkabez Halevi (@1540).[3] This Piyut[4] not only includes a refrain after each stanza calling upon us to greet and welcome the Shabbat Bride and Presence,[5] but also the custom to physically stand, turn and face the entrance of the synagogue, i.e., a symbolic “going out for the purpose of welcoming”, during the recitation of the liturgical poem’s final paragraph:

Enter in peace, Oh crown of her husband, (i.e., Bride)

Even in gladness and good cheer,

Among the faithful of the treasured nation,

Enter Oh Bride! Enter Oh Bride!

The metaphor of Shabbat being a Queen and/or Bride appears in the Midrash in a number of contexts, and appears to be a reflection of the designation of Shabbat as a day of rest exclusively for the Jewish people.

Beraishit Rabba 11:8

Why was Shabbat Blessed (by HaShem—see Beraishit 2:3)?...

R. Shimon bar Yochai taught:

Shabbat said before the Holy One, Blessed Be He, “Master of the Universe, each of them (the other days of the week) has a ‘spouse’, but I do not have one.” (Sunday-Monday; Tuesday-Wednesday; Thursday-Friday; Shabbat-??)

The Holy One, Blessed Be He Said to it, “The Congregation of Israel, is your ‘spouse.’”

And when Israel stood before Mt. Sinai, the Holy One, Blessed Be He, Said to them, “Remember the matter that I said to Shabbat, i.e., that the Congregation of Israel is your ‘spouse.’” This is the Commandment (that is part of the Ten Commandments), “Remember the day of Shabbat to sanctify it,” (thereby fulfilling His Promise to Shabbat to designate Israel as its “spouse”. Furthermore, the Midrash is drawing attention to the parallel between the Groom sanctifying his Bride, and the Jew sanctifying Shabbat by means of prayer and the recitation of Kiddush.)

The weekly “marriage” between Israel and its “Bashert,” i.e., Shabbat—or is it the other way around and it is Israel that is Shabbat’s “Bashert”[6]?—is further explicated by a commentator on the Aggada:[7]

MaHaRShA on Bava Kama 32a

…and just like by means of Kiddushin (sanctification) as she enters the Chuppa[8] does the Arusa (engaged woman) become a Nesua (a woman who has attained the status of a married woman), so too as Shabbat enters the sanctity of the day (Friday evening, a metaphysical type of Chuppa), she becomes married to Israel.

She is called a Queen because she is the Bride of a King, since each member of Israel is considered a child of royalty.[9]

The commentator then analyzes the subtle argument between R. Chanina and R. Yanai in Shabbat 119a/Bava Kama 32a as one that centers around whether the Groom goes out to greet the bride or it is the bride who comes to the Groom in order to be placed under his care and protection:

And this is why R. Chanina said, “at sunset of the evening of Shabbat”, i.e., on Shabbat evening before Shabbat’s entry, “come, let us go out and welcome”, for it is the way of the Groom to go and welcome the Bride, as it is written, (Devarim 33:2) “HaShem, from Sinai He Comes…”—He (the Groom) Went out to welcome them (the Jewish people; God was already on Sinai when Moshe brought the people near to the mountain. See Shemot 19.)[10]

And it (the Talmud) states that R. Yanai had a different perspective, for he did not say, “Let us go out to welcome her;” on the contrary he would stand in place, and therefore when she (Shabbat) would enter, he would say, “Come, Oh Bride! Come, Oh Bride!” This is the way of a Bride, after she enters under the Chupa, having come from her father’s house to the house of her husband. For this reason, R. Yanai states his welcome twice: Come, Oh Bride to the Chupa; Come, Oh Bride to the house of your husband.

And as far as the exclusivity of the relationship between Shabbat and Israel is concerned, it is further expanded upon in the following Midrashic source which similarly analogizes our connection to Shabbat as one between Bride and Groom:

Shemot Rabba 25:11

(Shemot 16:29) “See that HaShem has Given you (Israel) the Shabbat”…

And what does “has Given you” mean? He Gave it (Shabbat) to you and He did not Give it to the idolaters…

It is a parable to a king who is sitting opposite his wife (the Queen), anyone who passes between them (interrupts or interferes with their exclusive relationship) will be culpable.

Another Midrash presents Shabbat not so much as the Bride/Queen itself, but rather the medium by which the Jewish people maintains its relationship with God to Whom it is “married”:

Devarim Rabba 1:21

…Said R. Chiya bar Abba in the name of R. Yochanan: It is the way of the world, when the King and his consort (the Queen) are sitting and conversing with one another, someone who comes and inserts himself between them, wouldn’t he be guilty of a terrible offense? So too with regard to Shabbat, representing the relationship between Israel and the Holy One, Blessed Be He, as it is said, (Shemot 31: 17) “Between Me and the children of Israel...” Therefore every idolater who comes and inserts himself between them… is culpable...

Kabbalat Shabbat has always been my favorite prayer service of the week. The congregation is usually very much in the mood to move from the weekday mode to a Shabbat mood and atmosphere. The Nussach[11] of the Shliach Tzibbur is evocative and inspiring. The singing is heartfelt and soaring like…a wedding! Over time, stanzas from Lecha Dodi have been sung at weddings precisely because of the parallel symbolism and language. Particularly by means of our words and body language during Lecha Dodi, if we manage to place ourselves in the proper frame of mind, each of us relives our joyous wedding and marriage vows to HaShem week after week, experiencing deep joy and religious fulfillment.

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[1] Rabbis who lived during the epoch of the Mishna.

[2] In Bava Kama 32a, the text reads, “Come and let us go out and welcome the Bride, the Queen. There are others who say, “Come and let us go out and welcome the Shabbat Bride Queen.”

[3] The first letters of each of the first eight stanzas of Lecha Dodi spell out the name of the author, “Shlomo HaLevi.”

[4] Liturgical poem.

[5] “Come my Beloved to greet the bride; the Shabbat Presence let us welcome!”

[6] Achad HaAm’s famous sobriquet comes to mind, “More than Israel has kept the Shabbat, Shabbat has kept Israel.”

[7] MaHaRSA wrote two commentaries on the Talmud, one that focuses exclusively on the Halachic discussions and a second known as Chidushei Aggada (novella on the portions of the Talmud that deal with anecdotes, interpretations of verses from TaNaCh, philosophy, theology, etc.).

[8] Marriage canopy.

[9] See e.g., Shabbat 67a; 111a; 128a; Bava Metzia 113b. Furthermore, HaShem Tells Moshe in Shemot 19:6 that He Intends for the Jewish people to become a “kingdom of priests” which in addition to suggesting the superior status of the descendents of Aharon, also could be understood as connoting that each individual member of Israel is him/herself of royal standing.

[10] Some cite the image of the Giving of the Tora at Sinai as the basis of the custom for the Chatan to walk down the aisle and take his place under the Chupa before the Bride comes to meet him.

[11] Melodies and intonations of a particular prayer service. Different Nusachs are appropriate for different services and times of year, thereby conveying specific moods in addition to the words of the prayers themselves.