Change in the
Blink of an Eye
R. Yaakov Bieler
פרשת
תולדות תשס"ט
The
ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus, not only famously said, “You can’t step
in the same river twice,”[1]
[2]
but framed a similar sentiment in terms of an oxymoron: “Nothing endures but change.”[3]
Although human nature typically desires everything to remain static and known,
particularly when good things are happening to an individual,[4]
human experience starkly tells us that it is otherwise, and our fortunes and
conditions will inevitably fluctuate, at times widely and wildly, from point to
point.
In this
week’s Tora portion, the fortunes of Yitzchak and Rivka as well as their
children Yaakov and Eisav, change dramatically over the course of their lives :
a)
(Beraishit 25:20-26) After twenty years of
childless marriage, Rivka conceives and the couple must deal with raising
twins;
b)
(Ibid., 29-34) The birthright is sold, either
symbolically or even legally by Eisav to his younger brother Yaakov;
c)
(Ibid., 26:1-11) The family is forced to relocate due to
famine, and the king of Gerar has designs upon Rivka, which are narrowly averted;
d)
(Ibid., 12-14) Yitzchak goes from being a relatively
indigent person to one of great success and wealth;
e)
(Ibid., 15-22) Yitzchak’s success leads to conflict with the
local population and the family has to relocate a number of times until the
hostilities cease;
f)
(Ibid., 34-35) Eisav marries Canaanite women to the
displeasure of his parents;
g)
(Ibid., 27:1-30) Rivka masterminds a plot whereby Yaakov
pretends to be Eisav in order to receive his father’s blessing intended for
Eisav;
h)
(Ibid., 41-28:5) Eisav’s intention to kill his brother
once their father dies, leads Rivka to create a pretext where her younger son
relocates to Charan, ostensibly to seek out a wife for himself, and the family
unit is disrupted forever;[5]
i)
(Ibid., 6-9) Eisav, finally recognizing his parents’
displeasure over his initial marriage partners, marries an additional wife,
namely his uncle Yishmael’s daughter, in an attempt to appease his parents.
The changes in the family structure and consequent
challenges to Yitzchak and Rivka are direct outgrowths of the natural
progression of their lives. Children are considered an important aspect of
marriage; the birth and maturation of children not only change the dynamic that
had previously existed between the parents, but also often carry with it
strains and tensions due to typical competition among offspring; the growth of
a family creates acute concerns about providing for all of its members and
economic considerations become that much more important; a transition from
poverty to wealth brings with it its own unique set of challenges; and when
children begin to marry, new individuals are introduced into the family unit, accompanied
by their own psychological, cultural, moral and religious baggage. Thinking
along these lines brings us to a fresh interpretation of the couplets at the
beginning of the third chapter of Kohelet, verses 1-8:
To everything
there is a time, and a moment for every purpose under Heaven.
A time to
give birth and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot that which
is planted.
A time to
kill and a time to heal; a time to destroy and a time to build.
A time to cry
and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance.
A time to
throw stones and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace and a time to
distance oneself from embracing.
A time to
seek and a time to lose; a time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to
tear and a time to sew; a time to be silent and a time to speak.
A time to
love and a time to hate; a time for war and a time for peace.
Not only are these opposites natural parts of human
existence in general, but either literally or figuratively, they will be part
of the life of every human being. Changing and even contradictory modalities
make up the human experience.
While
life without all of these permutations would perhaps be simpler and less
potentially aggravating, on the other hand, it could be said that life without
such developments and the myriad dilemmas that accompany them would constitute
a relatively incomplete life. Perhaps the template for this sequence of
developments could be said to be a verse describing the projected pattern for
mankind, particularly according to one commentator’s interpretation:
Beraishit 2:24
Therefore an individual is to leave his father and mother
and cling to his spouse and they will be one flesh.
RaShI, op. cit. LeBasar Echad
The child is formed by both of them and in that way their
flesh is made into one.
Quite a
few changes are described in Yitzchak and Rivka’s domestic lives in Parashat
Toldot, and it is obvious that they take place over the course of 60 years.
At the beginning of the Parasha, Yitzchak is 40 when he marries (Ibid.,
25:20); he is 60 when the twins are born (Ibid., 26); the incident entailing
the selling of the birthright takes place when Yitzchak is 73 according to the
Rabbinic view that the term “VaYigdelu” (Ibid., 27) represents the boys
reaching the age of puberty/Bar Mitzva;[6]
if Eisav is 40 when he marries his first two wives (Ibid., 26:34) then Yitzchak
would have been 100.[7]
Consequently, although there may have been times of extreme turbulence during
Yitzchak and Rivka’s lives, there were other periods, sometimes lasting for
several years, of relative calm and routine. Our different attitudes to times
of turbulence as opposed to interludes of normalcy and even tranquility, is
reflected in one of Bill Watterson’s classic strips, Calvin and Hobbes,
describing a conversation between the boy and his stuffed tiger, as they are
careening down an embankment in a wagon, ultimately ending up in the middle of
a stream:[8]
Calvin: I
wish we could stop summer right here and have the days stay just the way they
are.
That’s the problem with life. It
rolls along with speed you can’t control. You can’t go faster or slower.
Fun experiences always go roaring
by…
While bad experiences never pass
quickly enough.
I wish we could choose how fast
and slow events go.
For example, I’d like to speed up
childhood and get to driving age.
Hobbes: It’s
not the pace of life I mind. It’s the sudden stop at the end.
Yet some
changes come fast and furiously, seeming to turn topsy- turvy one’s very existence
in a fraction of a second. Parashat Toldot contains at least one example
of such a phenomenon, as well. Yitzchak is going along, thinking that he
understands his children, knows what to expect from each of them, and is
prepared to confer on each an appropriate blessing, until he suddenly comes to
grips with how terribly mistaken he has been. Yaakov has barely left his
father’s presence, when Eisav returns with the venison that his father had
requested as a prerequisite for his receiving Yitzchak’s blessing.
Beraishit 27:30-33
…And Eisav his brother came from his hunting.
And he also
made for him tasty food and he brought it to his father, and he said to his
father: Let my father arise and eat from the hunted food of his son in order
that your soul will bless me.
And Yitchak
his father said to him: Who are you? And he said: I am your son, your first
born, Eisav.
And Yitzchak
trembled an excessively great trembling and he said; Who therefore was it who
hunted food and brought it to me and I ate from all of it before you came, and
I blessed him…
A poetic metaphor for an instantaneous event that
involves fundamental change is utilized by R. Yose when explaining the length
of the period of time between the end of one day and the
beginning of the next, i.e., Bein HaShemashot:
Berachot 2b
R. Yose said: Bein HaShemashot KeHeref Ayin
(like the blink of an eye.)
It is this very metaphor that the Midrash utilizes when
describing how HaShem Came to the immediate aid of a key biblical figure,
effectively turning the tables of a battle that had reached a stalemate:
Beraishit Rabba 59:11
…This is what is written, (II Shmuel 21:16) “And
Yishbi BeNov, who was of the sons of the Rafa, the weight of whose spear was
300 Shekels,[9]
he being girded with a new sword, thought to have slain David.” He (Yishbi)
lifted him (David) up with his shield and he (David) jumped backwards 18 Amot
(27’). Each was awed by the other. This one was awed by the other, saying: If
he can jump backwards like that, who can tell how far he can jump forwards? And
that one was awed by this one saying: If he can throw me with his shield in
this manner, how will I be able to overpower him? At that moment, David said:
If only I had one of my family and he would help me! Immediately, (Ibid., 17)
“But Avishay the son of Tzeruya came to his help, and smote the Philistine and
killed him.” Was he standing behind the
door?[10]
The Rabbis said: Even if he had been at the ends of the earth, God Caused him
to fly and Brought him B’Heref Ayin (in the blink of an eye) in order
that that righteous individual not be troubled any more than was necessary…
And so it was with Yitzchak, in the sense of a cruel
realization rather than an act of Divine Salvation, that K’Heref Ayin
he had to come to grips with realities that had never before crossed his
mind—what were Yaakov and Eisav really like, and had he drastically
miscalculated with respect to doling out Blessings in accordance with what they
had done in the past and were going to do in the future?
Such
sudden reversals of fortune KeHeref Ayin have been brought squarely
before the world as a whole and our community in particular this past week. On
the one hand, a young woman in our midst is suddenly and completely
unexpectedly taken ill and as much as possible we find ourselves trying to be
supportive of her and her family and do what is necessary to answer the needs
of all concerned. Baruch HaShem, it appears that there has been a sudden
Yeshua, Beli Ayin HaRa, that parallels the original calamity, and we
pray for her continued and steady recovery. Unfortunately Rabbi Gavriel and Rabbanit
Rivka Holtzberg, A”H, along with ≈200 others, did not fare so well and
were killed cruelly and suddenly by terrorists in Mumbai. Many members of our
community have passed through their Chabad House and been the recipients of
their hospitality and assistance. It is literally incomprehensible to imagine
how individuals who dedicate themselves so unstintingly and sacrificially to
the Mitzvot of Hachnasat Orchim (welcoming guests), and Kiruv
Rechokim (trying to bring closer to Judaism those who have grown distant
from their religious heritage) should be made to suffer and die in such a
horrendous manner. However, it is important to keep in mind a Talmudic
statement that addresses how one is to respond to situations and events such as
these:
Said Rava, and others R. Chisda: If a person sees that
afflictions have come upon him, let him inspect his actions, as it is said, (Eicha
3:40) “Let us inspect our actions and analyze and return to HaShem.”…
Although the specific context of the Talmud suggests that
such situations may have come about due to some type of shortcoming in
ourselves, it seems to me that another means by which this can be viewed is to
resolve that as a response to the states of affairs that are disturbing us, we
should find ways to respond positively, each in his own way and in accordance
with his own ability and capacity, to allow what has happened to these
individuals to inspire us to raise our own commitments and devotions, to do
more that we have done previously for the ill, to decide how we can ourselves
be more sacrificial in our own lives. In this way these situations will have
some positive effect upon us all, even as we deeply wish they never had taken
place at all.
Let us
sincerely pray for a full Refua Shleima for all those who are sick
and/or injured, as well as resolve to dedicate our own lives just that much
more to Tora and Mitzvot as a proper remembrance of those who
have suffered so much.
[1] The
Yale Book of Quotations, ed. Fred Shapiro,
[2] The premise of Heraclitus’ comment is that everything is in flux; not only is the river constantly changing, but you are as well, as is the earth, the universe, etc.
[3]Ibid.
[4] Rabbi Avi Weiss once related the following story:
A father, upon marrying off his last child was overheard to cry out to God, “Give me a nail!” When asked by his disciples what the father could possibly have meant by such a request, the Rebbe stated, “The man understands that life is like a point on a moving wheel, which is either ascending or descending. Now that he is experiencing this wonderful point in his and his family’s lives, he desperately wishes for a means by which he could permanently preserve this sense of euphoria and intense happiness, in effect stopping that point on the wheel’s impending descent.”
[5] Although Rivka is thought to have kept her word to Yaakov regarding sending for him when she perceives that the threat posed by Eisav has passed (Beraishit 27:45)—this is indicated by the otherwise unexplained presence of Devora, Rivka’s nursemaid among Yaakov’s entourage (Ibid., 35:8), he initially extends his stay with Lavan beyond when he first mentions to his wives that he wishes to return to his family home (Ibid., 30:25 ff.), which might have coincided with Devora’s first coming to him at Rivka’s behest. By Yaakov agreeing to stay with Lavan in order to expand his wealth in the end might have caused him to miss even Rivka’s funeral, which the Rabbis interpret is being hinted at by the plural form of Alon Bachut—see RaMBaN on Ibid., 35:8.
[6] See RaShI on Beraishit 25:27, op.cit. VaYigdelu HaNa’arim VaYehi Eisav.
[7] According to the Rabbinic interpretation that Yitzchak’s inability to see (Beraishit 27:1) was directly due to his daughters-in-law offering up idolatrous incense (see RaShI on Ibid., op. cit. VaTich’hena—1st of three interpretations), then the incident of Yaakov’s taking Eisav’s blessing did not take place long after Yitzchak reached the age of 100. According to RaShI on Ibid., 35:29, op. cit. VaYigva Yitzchak, Yaakov was 63 when he received his blessings (he not only got the blessing intended for Eisav, but also one that always meant for him—see Ibid., 28:1-4) from Yitzchak, thereby making Yitzchak at that point 103.
[8] Homicidal
Psycho Jungle Cat: A Calvin and Hobbes Collection, Andrews McMeel
Publishing,
[9] This indicates that he was as formidable an opponent as Golyat had been—see I Shmuel 17.
[10] I.e., how could David have received the assistance of his family member so quickly?